True Repentance Without Legalism: How Can I Truly Return to God?

Question:

If your heart is distant from God, what is the process of returning back to Him without becoming legalistic?

Lee Dodd’s Response:

Starting with Confession

“That’s an excellent question. I believe we should begin with confession, as it is the starting point. Psalm 51 is perhaps one of the greatest texts in the Bible that highlights genuine, heartfelt confession directed entirely toward God. There’s no hint of legalism in Psalm 51. It is the cry of David’s heart when he is estranged from God after hardening his heart for months following his sin with Bathsheba and Uriah. Convicted by Nathan the prophet, he wholeheartedly turns back to God in confession.

Understanding True Confession

There is a brokenness that permeates Psalm 51, which I think results from genuine confession of sin. Confession isn’t merely mouthing prayers; it’s feeling toward that sin what God feels. Remember 1 John 1:9: ‘If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.’ Confessing our sins means having the same animosity and hatred toward sin that God has. When we grieve over it and are broken by our sins, this becomes the pathway back to experiential reconciliation with God.

When we sin, there’s not an objective separation between us and God, but we feel a subjective break in our relationship with Him. Through confession, which produces appropriate brokenness over our sin, the relationship is reconciled. Brokenness, as described in Psalm 51:16-17, is equally represented in the New Testament. Think of the Beatitudes—the phrases Jesus uses like ‘Blessed are the poor in spirit’ and ‘Blessed are those who mourn.’ I believe this centers on the brokenness believers feel over their sinful behavior.”

Michael Durham’s Response:

Feeling What God Feels About Sin

“I’ve spent a lifetime trying to see this in a very practical way. Brother Lee’s answer is spot on. It’s about thinking and feeling, to some degree, what God thinks and feels about your sin. It’s not just saying you’re sorry; that’s not true confession. We often use the word ‘confession’ when we say to someone, ‘Hey, I’m sorry I sinned against you.’ But the biblical meaning of confession is much more. It’s a heart and mind that feels, to some degree, what God says, thinks, and feels about your sin.

The Role of God’s Discipline

Here’s the key point: I can preach to you all this weekend somewhat hard, and it’s not been easy to listen to. It might keep your attention because you’re not used to hearing things like this, and perhaps I’m unique in the way I preach. But it’s not pleasant to listen to. I know I can preach that way because I have some of God’s people here, and I have a word from the Lord—Hebrews chapter 12—that if you’re His child, He will discipline you. He will pursue you to restore you to Himself.

The Necessity of the Holy Spirit

So when I preach as I did last night and today, I know God’s people will hear that, and God can use it to discipline them, correct them, and bring them back to Himself. Listen carefully: you cannot break your own heart. You need the Holy Spirit. If you can hear the words from Paul last night, from me last night and today, from Brother Brian this morning, and you leave unaffected, you need to be concerned. God’s promise is to discipline His children—those whom He loves, He chastens. If there’s no chastening going on, my dear friend, I urge you to reevaluate where you really are with God.”